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Learn more about our friends at LeaderTreks, the wonderful folks who provide the majority of the training resouces used in the SALT program.

The Weekly Word

Our post for this week is a bit of a no-brainer, but nonetheless is also a good reminder as we work hand in hand with teenagers. It comes from the blog of our friend Doug Franklin of LeaderTreks. Here’s what Doug has to say regarding teachable moments…

“A teachable moment is connecting a student’s experience to an overarching truth that can be applied to their lives.” These moments are what we live for as youth workers. We play all the games, go to all the bad stage plays, do the overnights and go on retreats so that once or twice a year we get to have a teachable moment with a student. When it happens, it’s awesome!

The Weekly Word

Pasted below is a recent blog from Doug Franklin, our friend over at LeaderTreks.  Pay extra attention to his words of wisdom toward the end of the post, and keep these words in mind as you engage your times of mentoring.  Authenticity is the key.

The Rebel Youth Pastor is Out of Style
There was a time when students wanted to hear from the guy with the tattoo. They loved to hear about the drugs and the mistakes and the unbelievable turnaround in life. Whether this was marked by a tattoo or a piercing, somehow this style became cool. As a youth worker, maybe you started feeling like you had nothing to say if you didn’t have a larger than life story or a skin marking to symbolize that story. Perhaps you even looked for ways of dressing up your own story to be a little rougher around the edges. It’s different now; the rebel youth leader is out of style. Maybe too many youth guys followed in the footprints of the rebels. In reality students want what they always wanted: authenticity. They want to follow someone who is real, venerable and honest. You are enough. Just give your students the authentic leader they crave and you’ll see a lasting impact occur.

The Weekly Word

I came across an interesting article from the YS blog regarding Facebook (you know that “thing” we all spend too much time on).  The giest of the post was how to better connect with your youth, parents, etc.  If you’re interested in the post, click here, it’s a rather helpful read.

What it got me to thinking about however, was how as mentors could you use Facebook to enhance what you are already doing with your mentee?  The possibilities are likely near endless, but I thought of a few just off the top of my head.

• easy way to remind and confirm up coming meetings
• create a space to further talk about the month’s lesson
• follow up on Action Steps from the monthly lessons
• daily or weekly encouragment

If you’ve never thought about how to partner Facebook with your mentoring efforts maybe it’s time to consider the wealth of possibilities.

The Weekly Word (announcement)

The Weekly Word will be taking a short break, through the Thanksgiving holiday.  We will return the week of December 7.  Until then, have a great Thanksgiving with family and friends and continue being faithful in meeting, listening, sharing, exploring, questioning, learning, growing and living live with your mentee.  Blessings.

The Weekly Word

This week’s thought, is a blog of a blog of a blog… It comes from Kem Meyer, via Josh Griffin’s blog.  Here is the excerpt from Josh…

***

Kem Meyer has a great article today on overpromising in the church – something that I think I might not be alone in in youth ministry. Here’s a clip, worth the read and the evaluation of what you’re promising:

“Come experience a community of grace.”
Again, nice goal, but you can’t control the outcome. I had promised a “community of grace” for a friend of mine and she finally joined me for a weekend service. During the message, her cell phone went off. A man sitting behind us scolded her for being rude and selfish. He even asked her not to come back if she couldn’t have the decency to turn her phone off during church. True story. Yes, it’s a distraction for others when a cell phone goes off. Obviously. However, what isn’t obvious is that my friend was taking a gigantic step by attending church for the first time in years. My friend didn’t look at the man as an individual, she looked at him as the church. And, I had not delivered on my promise.

Are we making statements as if they were facts, when in reality they are subjective and left to personal interpretation?

Are we promising something we can’t deliver on?

Are we baiting people with exaggerated benefits?

The reason I pulled this out for our thought this week, is because this is so easy for mentors to do with their mentee.  Believe me I know how difficult it can be at times to spark a quality conversation or wade through the training material and because of this we sometimes resort to the over promise.  One of the greatest tools we as mentors can have in our tool belt is the ability to be real and authentic with our mentees. Forget the oversell, rather focus on being you and I believe in the end you’ll realize it was the better way to go.

The Weekly Word

Today, I thought I’d go more practical, rather than philosophical. So I present to you 10 Unfinished Sentences, by Les Christie of Youth Specialties fame.

1. I enjoy being around people who…
2. When I wake up in the middle of the night I sometimes worry about…
3. The most dangerous thing I would like to try to do would be…
4. What bugs me most about movies and television is…
5. If I could change one thing about the way I was raised it would be…
6. The best time of day for me to take a few moments to be with God is…
7. The worst thing about church is…
8. My definition of success is…
9. When I get embarrassed, I usually…
10. I can talk for hours about…

Feel free to use these the next time you’re not sure how to break the ice with your mentee.

If you have other unfinished sentences, feel free to share…

The Weekly Word

Here a good reminder of the role wisdom plays in our lives.  Positioned along side a mentoring relationship, and I think you have the recipe for long term success.

photo by: Hugo Humberto Plácido da Silva

The Weekly Word

I snagged these helpful tips/reminders from Josh Griffin’s blog, and while this post is largely reflecting on youth ministry in general; I think these tips/reminders hold just as true for a mentoring context.  Here’s what guest blogger, Andy Disher had to say regarding mapping directions…

I’ve learned (sometimes the hard way) – that in ministry, it’s good to know where you’re going before you get there.

Chart out the direction of your ministry. Highlight the portions of your journey that you do not want to get lost.  Track your progress and know where you’ve come from, and where you are going.

Prepare for possible detours. However, don’t focus on the detours, don’t dwell on them, don’t live in them…. just be ready for them.  They will come! And when they come – take a breath, and allow God to help you navigate through them.

Plan your rest stops. Rest stops were created for a reason.  Sleep, food, bathroom break, and more food.  Find a “rest stop” in your season of ministry to re-energize, re-focus and just rest!  You need those moments to rest.

Balance your speed.  We all speed on the road.  There is always someone going too slow.  In ministry, there is a time and a place for speeding through it.  The momentum might be going well, and you might be cruising along, enjoying the scenery.  However, know when to turn the cruise control off, slow it down a little bit, and reflect on where you are.

The Weekly Word

Here is a very good word from our friend Mark Ray on the topic of our masks vs that of being transparent.

As mentors we certainly desire our mentee to be comfortable enough to show their true selves with us and in reality to the world around them.  However, the same is also true for us as mentors.  We too must be authentic and true (transparent) as we guide and walk along side the young person we have opportunity to mentor.  Obviously, this is easier said than done.  Thankfully Mark has provided us some useful insight into this issue.

Here is a snippet of Mark’s post…

…For many of us, from the time we are very young, we begin the art of hiding, becoming actors on the world stage and masters of fiction. We take great care to display to those around us only those things they may find good and acceptable, and we disguise and conceal those things that might earn us disapproval or out-right rejection… [read full story]

The Weekly Word

Kid’s Can Tell…

One of the things that I have noticed about youth ministry is that a lot of youth pastors view their role as a stepping stone to get to that “bigger pulpit” — you know the one in “Big Church” where the real people are. I’d like to share something with you all: Kids can tell.

But, we also know this – we can tell when you authentically love us. We can tell when you are drawn to the messy world of teenagers – not just so you can extend your adolescence, but so you can lead us through ours and into a maturing, crazy courageous faith in Jesus. [Read Full Story]

This article is a good reminder to any of us working with teenagers; especially those of us serving in the role as mentor.  Teenagers are savvy creatures with a keen ability to know when our heart isn’t directed at them.  Not only are they savvy, they can be selfish.  Mix the two together and you have a recipe that demands our full attention.  As mentors we must remember to be fully with your mentees (at least while we are together with them).  I would never suggest you give all of your time and attention to them (you have a life outside of your mentoring relationship), but when you’re with them… be with them.

Practical ways to accomplish this…

• Be on time for your meetings (this assumes you make the meeting in the first place)
• Be intentional about not canceling or changing meeting dates and times (obviously things do come up last minute, but make this exception rather than the rule).
• Turn off the cell during your meeting (it’s a couple of hours, most things can wait and this is why voicemail was created).
• Don’t meet somewhere you know you’re likely to be distracted (I know I can’t meet at BW3… there are far too many TV’s hanging on the walls).

Remember, it’s about the connection and the relationship that is developed because of the connection.  Do your part to foster that, for if you aren’t your mentee will be able to tell.